Moody Monday: The Torch

I am a spiritual midwife.  I call myself that because although I don't have the credentials behind my name, my spirit has been called to this sacred artwork for life.  It is something you don't choose, but rather it chooses you.  Ask any midwife and they will tell you the same.  My journey has been long, whindy, and full of surprises, but I strongly feel this is the road the Creator deemed necessary for me to fully blossom into the kind of midwife that can walk by example and set new standards for our women and community.  As my generation of midwives steps through the door, OUR grand midwives are moving on to knew things because they are tired, learning to live for themselves, and reaching new dreams.  Black midwives like Makeda Kamara, UmmSalaamah Sondra Abdullah-Zaimah, Nonkululeko Tyehemba, Sarahn Henderson, Shafia Monroe, and the list goes on. 

International Day of the Midwife is coming this weekend, May 5, and I start by tipping my hat off to these amazing women who are still with us, inspiring me every day, and revolutionizing midwifery today.  If you don't know the true history of midwifery, I urge you to educate yourself.  Black midwives are THE foundation of midwifery in American history and NO midwife can ignore this fact.  We must all begin to recognize them, honor them, and never forget their works sparked our everlasting flame.

Wednesday Wisdom: Feet First

My first baby came into this world feet first, planted on solid ground.  We tried everything under the sun to change her position, but in the end she just loved being close to my heart and that was just fine with me.  Some babies are just meant to come this way, how the Creator planned.  Being breech is not "wrong", abnormal, or impossible when you have an experienced provider.  Here is one of the many methods I tried which for some works extremely well:  Breech Tilt

Happy relaxation :)

Moody Monday: Eye Gazing

You are gonna LOVE breastfeeding! There is nothing more magnificent than the first eye-to-eye contact made while watching your newborn take their first suckle at your breast.  Sometimes its a perfect transition, sometimes sloppy, and sometimes it takes a bit of work to make it a team effort.  But once your in the groove, you can't be stopped!  As this new bond flowers, it gets better and better like a fine wine.  Soon you get a RHYTHM: baby arouses gently from sleep, starts to smack their lips or even suck their hand ferociously, smelling your milk they use their routing reflex to find the soft perfectly made nipple.  The sucking begins and there is no smacking, slurping, or discomfort. 

After the first couple of weeks y'all are making sweet MUSIC together: falling to sleep together after nursing in a side lying position in bed.  Baby wakes up hungry and literally grabs your breast taking full control of the let down flow, how they want to receive their meal, and feeling the strongest connection with the woman they love more than anything in this world.  Ahhhhh!! It's my favorite moment in breastfeeding and I hope it will be yours too. P.S. I promise it doesn't hurt one bit

Wednesday Wisdom: Vaginal Postpartum...what to expect

Mayo Clinic Report Pregnancy changes your body in more ways than you might have guessed, and it doesn't stop when the baby is born. After a vaginal delivery, taking good care of yourself is an essential part of postpartum care. Here's what to expect.

Vaginal soreness

If you had an episiotomy or vaginal tear during delivery, the wound might hurt for a few weeks. Extensive tears might take longer to heal. In the meantime, you can help promote healing:

• Soothe the wound. Cool the wound with an ice pack, or place a chilled witch hazel pad — available in most pharmacies — between a sanitary napkin and the wound.
• Take the sting out of urination. Pour warm water over your vulva as you're urinating. Press a clean pad firmly against the wound when you bear down for a bowel movement.
• Keep the wound clean. Use a squirt bottle filled with water to rinse the tissue between the vaginal opening and anus (perineum) after using the toilet.
• Sit down carefully. If sitting is uncomfortable, sit on a pillow or padded ring.

While you're healing, expect the discomfort to progressively improve. Contact your health care provider if the pain intensifies, the wound becomes hot, swollen and painful, or you notice a pus-like discharge.
Vaginal discharge
You'll have a vaginal discharge (lochia) for a number of weeks after delivery. Expect a bright red, heavy flow of blood for the first few days. If you've been sitting or lying down, you might notice a small gush when you stand up. The discharge will gradually taper off, changing from pink or brown to yellow or white. To reduce the risk of infection, use sanitary napkins rather than tampons.
Don't be alarmed if you occasionally pass small blood clots. Contact your health care provider if:

• You soak a sanitary pad within an hour while lying down
• The discharge has a foul odor
• You pass clots larger than a golf ball
• You have a fever of 100.4 F (38 C) or higher

Contractions
You might feel contractions, sometimes called afterpains, during the first few days after delivery. These contractions — which often resemble menstrual cramps — help prevent excessive bleeding by compressing the blood vessels in the uterus. For reasons that aren't entirely clear, these contractions tend to be stronger with successive deliveries. Your health care provider might recommend an over-the-counter pain reliever if necessary.
Contact your health care provider if you have a fever or if your abdomen is tender to the touch. These signs and symptoms could indicate a uterine infection.
Urination problems
Swelling or bruising of the tissues surrounding the bladder and urethra can lead to difficulty urinating. Fearing the sting of urine on the tender perineal area can have the same effect. Difficulty urinating usually resolves on its own. In the meantime, it might help to pour water across your vulva while you're sitting on the toilet.
Contact your health care provider if you have any symptoms of a urinary tract infection. For example:

• It hurts to urinate
• You don't think you're emptying your bladder fully
• You have an unusually frequent urge to urinate

Pregnancy and birth stretch the connective tissue at the base of the bladder and can cause nerve and muscle damage to the bladder or urethra. You might leak urine when you cough, strain or laugh. Fortunately, this problem usually improves within three months. In the meantime, wear sanitary pads and do Kegel exercises to help tone your pelvic floor muscles.
To do Kegels, tighten your pelvic muscles as if you're stopping your stream of urine. Try it for five seconds at a time, four or five times in a row. Work up to keeping the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions. Aim for at least three sets of 10 repetitions a day.
Hemorrhoids and bowel movements
If you notice pain during bowel movements and feel swelling near your anus, you might have hemorrhoids — stretched and swollen veins in the anus or lower rectum. To ease any discomfort while the hemorrhoids heal, soak in a warm tub and apply chilled witch hazel pads to the affected area. Your health care provider might recommend a topical hemorrhoid medication as well.
If you find yourself avoiding bowel movements out of fear of hurting your perineum or aggravating the pain of hemorrhoids or your episiotomy wound, take steps to keep your stools soft and regular. Eat foods high in fiber — including fruits, vegetables and whole grains — and drink plenty of water. It's also helpful to remain as physically active as possible. Ask your health care provider about a stool softener or fiber laxative, if needed.
Another potential problem for new moms is the inability to control bowel movements (fecal incontinence) — especially if you had an unusually long labor. Frequent Kegel exercises can help. If you have persistent trouble controlling bowel movements, consult your health care provider.
Sore breasts and leaking milk
Several days after delivery, your breasts might become heavy, swollen and tender. This is known as engorgement. To ease the discomfort, nurse your baby or use a breast pump to express milk. You might also want to apply cold washcloths or ice packs to your breasts. Over-the-counter pain relievers might help, too. To help prevent nipple pain, make sure that your baby latches on to your breast correctly. If you're unsure or every feeding is painful, ask a lactation consultation for help.
If your breasts leak between feedings, wear nursing pads inside your bra to help keep your shirt dry. Change pads after each feeding and whenever they get wet.
If you're not breast-feeding your baby, wear a firm, supportive bra. Compressing your breasts will help stop milk production. In the meantime, don't pump your breasts or express the milk. This only tells your breasts to produce more milk.
Hair loss and skin changes
During pregnancy, elevated hormone levels put normal hair loss on hold. The result is often an extra-lush head of hair — but now it's payback time. After delivery, your body sheds the excess hair all at once. Within six months, your hair will most likely be back to normal. In the meantime, shampoo only when necessary, and find a hairstyle that's easy to maintain. Avoid curling irons and harsh chemicals.
Stretch marks won't disappear after delivery, but eventually they'll fade from reddish purple to silver or white. Expect any skin that darkened during pregnancy — such as the line down your abdomen (linea nigra) — to slowly fade as well.
Mood changes
Childbirth triggers a jumble of powerful emotions. Mood swings, irritability, sadness and anxiety are common. Many new moms experience a mild depression, sometimes called the baby blues. The baby blues typically subside within a week or two. In the meantime, take good care of yourself. Share your feelings, and ask your partner, loved ones or friends for help. If your depression deepens or you feel hopeless and sad most of the time, contact your health care provider. Prompt treatment is important.
Weight loss
After you give birth, you'll probably feel flabby and out of shape. You might even look like you're still pregnant. Don't worry. This is perfectly normal. Most women lose more than 10 pounds during birth, including the weight of the baby, placenta and amniotic fluid. In the days after delivery, you'll lose additional weight from leftover fluids. After that, a healthy diet and regular exercise can help you gradually return to your pre-pregnancy weight.
The postpartum checkup
About six weeks after delivery, your health care provider will check your vagina, cervix and uterus to make sure you're healing well. He or she might do a breast exam and check your weight and blood pressure, too. This is a great time to talk about birth control, breast-feeding and how you're adjusting to life with a new baby. You might also ask about Kegel exercises to help tone your pelvic floor muscles.
Above all, share any concerns you might have about your physical or emotional health. Chances are, what you're feeling is entirely normal. Look to your health care provider for assurance as you enter this new phase of life.

Mood Monday: Creating Life

Motherhood is no small feet.  Its a job that last a life time because the role continues to morph into something different based on your child's age.  Its 24 hours a day, seven days a week: no days off.  Ask most mothers and they will share how challenging, constant, and tiring being a mother is.  But the greatest reward is having a beautiful little bundle to watch grow up before your eyes: those first flutters of movement in the womb, the energy and unity it takes to bring it into the world, 1st suckle at the breast, laughing, crawling, walking, needing momma when ill, first days at school, etc.  Its all a blessing and brings joy and calm to your heart. 

Women are encouraged to really meditate on when you are READY to create new life because the life deserves to receive all the love and nurturing you have to give.  Please take steps to heal yourself emotionally, physically, and spiritually before CREATING the life instead of just letting it happen.

Feasting Friday: Fiberific

Here is an amazing twist on homemade oatmeal I concocted this week and its EXCELLENT for pregnant and postpartum women.  Enjoy!

Ingredients:
1.5C oats (whole or steel cut NOT instant)
1C Pear Spiced Cider ($0.99 at Trader Joes)
1/2C craisins
1/4C sliced almonds
1tsp flax seeds
Sweetner to taste (honey or raw sugar)
1tsp Cinnamon
Pat of butter
Dash of coconut Milk (or milk of choice)

Instructions
1. Bring the cider to a boil in a small pot
2. Add craisins and oats and cook according to your oats instructions
3. Once the oats are done, add the remaining ingredients to your taste and consistency preference (I like a less liquid oatmeal)

Nutritional Value
Oats: source of fiber which is important for reducing heart disease, intestinal problems, and stroke
Flaxseed: high in fiber, omega-3 fatty acids, phytochemicals called lignans, laxative (to improve digestive health or relieve constipation), help reduce total blood cholesterol and low-density lipoprotein (LDL, or "bad") cholesterol levels
Almonds: source of protein, fights choleterol, offers Vitamin E and other vitamins/minerals
Craisins: fights urinary tract infections, heart disease and cancers
Cinnamon: regulates blood sugar and anti-clotting effect in the blood

Moody Monday: We

Here is a quote from the amazing Iyanla Vanzant that I just had to share for Moody Monday because I see a direct correlation between We and Pregnancy.  Our ancestors passed down tried traditions, beliefs, and ceremonies around pregnancy and birth.  As a people, we owe it to them to learn them, honor them, and pass on the things that strengthen the cycle and create positive birth experiences:

The following is an excerpt from the book, Tapping the Power Within, A Path to Self-Empowerment for Women, pages 26 - 28.

The Circle of Life

One powerful way to honor our ancestors is to embody the principles they taught and continue the traditions they live. African people are a “we” people. We, in a cultural sense, moves us beyond the shallow consciousness of “my life is only about me”. We encourage just to remember that everything I do is a reflection on everyone in my line. We motivates us to be better for those watching and those coming behind.

My sister understood this and lived it. She taught me things that had empowered her as a way of sharing, expanding, and evolving the traditions that sustained her. She taught me what our mother had taught her, what may, in fact, has been taught for generations. Of course, things change, times change; people lose track of stories in the people who passed them on. We can, however, still honor the lives of the ancestors by remembering what we can, practicing and passing on the positive traditions that have been passed on to us.

For example, I always washed and combed my daughter's hair on Sunday evenings. I was tickled when I saw one of them had continued that tradition with her own daughter. This is a profound and practical way to elevate the spiritual energy of the ancestors to do as they did in order to sustain the group. Without knowing it, many of us probably do it anyway. When, however, we can remember the name of the one who taught the practice, or lived the principle, we create a more intimate connection.

What I know now is that how I live my life either honors or dishonors my ancestors. I also know it is not important for me to dissect, evaluate or judge their behaviors and dysfunctions. My job, our job, is to respect the continuum of life. We must embrace and embody with reverence the good/positive qualities that our ancestors demonstrated because it was this essence of their lives that pave the way for us. They have set the example for how to live in family and community.

Dr. Betty Shabazz has always invoked a quote attributed to Alex Haley. "We must find the good and praise it."

Find the good your ancestors left behind and live your life as an expression of it. We carry the energy of our ancestors in our DNA. Therefore, living the best of who they were, what they taught and what they believed elevates their essence and advances our growth.

What I know now is that every life, every being that ever took a breath and the physical form, is an ancestor. What I know now is that all things fade into God. All things are neutralized, brought into equality, balance out in unity with Spirit.